You Were All Wrong About Nany
You were all wrong about Nany, and I told you so. Nany Nany boo boo, stick your head in doo doo.
***EDIT: for all the feedback that I “don’t like Nany” and that “this is ridiculous cause she is great and proven,” I’d like to get this out of the way now:
Nany Gonzalez’s Challenge Career:
6 Total Shows, 1 Final
Elimination Record: 3 wins 6 losses
I have no hatred toward Nany — in fact I have very little feeling at all. She was neither here nor there for me, I’ve watched all her seasons and can’t really remember anything standing out. Cool? Now...on with the showwwww...
chk out: Saniacpodcast.com
First, I’d like to remind everyone that this is a spoiler-free site. In doing Power Rankings & Odds, etc. I could quite simply go dig for spoilers and nail em all. Except, this is all for entertainment, and to provide some talking points. It’s also fun to see how well I do at projections —I’ve got a pretty good track record creating odds for Challenge-related material —but the fact that a large group of people already know the outcome sometimes makes this trying.
The reason I bring this up: my initial Power Rankings caused a stir with some. The two main takeaways: Nany/Turbo were too low, Ashley/Chase too high. And while I agreed with both sentiments to an extent (both teams made moves on my board after week one), something was quite obviously rotten in Denmark.
Look, it would be easy for a lot of people, even people that know the Challenge well, to discredit Ashley Mitchell. She quits, she cries, she wins. Those are her three modes. And while I certainly had her team way too high early on (#3 overall team on my Way Too Early Power Rankings), I came to my senses after one episode of seeing Chase and dropped them to 14 (on my Week One Power Rankings).
I’ve said it before, I believe in Ashley. Some claim she was handed Invasion — and while Amanda did give up her spot in the X elim, it was partially strategic. And yes, that finale was easy, but guess what —it was easy for everyone, and she still beat them. And don’t get me started on FR; Hunter was a stud but she worked everyone —including her friends and allies—to put herself in the position to steal that money. Was she the most dominant player? No. Was she the smartest and most manipulative? Hell yes. And in the Challenge, that makes a Champion.
But defending Ashley isn’t my point. I thought Chase, being an athlete and built well, would help Ashley propel this team. He did none of that. Move on.
However, after posting Ashley/Chase at 3, I had several argue with her placement so high, and a few in particular came back with “I guarantee” or “I’ll bet you anything” that she doesn’t make it past 2-3 episodes.
Luck? Nostradamus? Maybe. But it seems to me some Challenge folk out there just couldn’t handle the wait. Predictions are great, but for a handful to specifically say the defending champ would be outed first has me feeling a little mehhhh. Don’t come at me with your big, bold predictions when it’s quite obvious you’ve been reading ahead (if you know what I mean).
However, on to the MAIN EVENT: What happened to everyone’s favorite returner Nany? I received more hate mail over ranking Nany and Turbo so low —and while I get the love for Turbo (I’m pretty god-damned pumped about him too), I’ve been a Nany detractor this entire time.
Not that I have any feelings either way for Nany, I just didn’t believe she was a strong competitor during her prime, and certainly didn’t believe in her now.
So, let’s get it straight here: in this week’s tug-of-war-esque daily, we saw Amanda and her shlub of a partner Josh face the monster wrecking machine Turbo and vet Nany.
To explain the game, simply: pull the rope til it’s tight, trying to acquire the most slack on your side, then hang in there for five minutes. Your partner does the same, and the total combined length determines winners and losers. Easy? Easy. Oh there’s also a monster truck but that has literally no bearing on anything.
So, here’s where shit gets interesting. We get our three winners: Team Bananas beats Team Wes, Theo and Cara smush Hunter, and Amanda and Josh beat Turbo and Nany. That. Is. Not. A. Typo.
So, what does this mean? My guess is that Turbo handled business against Josh. MTV doesn’t give us a breakdown, of course, but we are talking a two-time Survivor winning, street fighting maniac vs fucking pots & pans weeping Josh.
So —all of you out there yelling in my ear that Nany is some queen bee and I need to respect her —it appears that she just got ROASTED by Amanda. And to be clear, I am in the minority that thinks Amanda is a very strong competitor. I’ve said it plenty of times —had Zach been born with one ounce of chivalry or even general respect for the opposite sex, her team wins a million bucks last season.
I’m gonna hear that this was only one comp, that Josh did better than I’m giving credit, etc. We all know that’s bullshit. Nany is weak, she’s a liability, and she is the exact reason TurboNany will find their way out of the house around the midpoint of the season.